to Tree's branches
back to Welcome on to Conclusion
19 A Receptive Listener
Suppose that you have just had a valuable thought and expressed it in a neat remark to your friend. Your friend comes back with, "You mean the ... ought to have ... (etc.)" If your friend got it right, that's a treat but if he or she got it wrong, what a nuisance! In fact, people who usually get it right become good friends, and people who usually get it wrong --- it is a waste of time talking to them really; it is clear that they are not on the same wavelength.
In short, one seeks a match between what one said or put out and what the other person heard or took in. First, you have to say it well; then they have to "get it," --- and for a conversation to really swim along, you need to get a response that makes sense to you. It is these three parts that interweave (like three strands in a braid) and give the two people their treat.
(See also Quality Time)